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Joke of the Day
"Where do you keep microscopic criminals? In cells."
Next Joke
"How do you fit an elephant into a safeway bag? You take the 's' out of safe and the 'f' out of way."
"Him: She's always doing magic tricks Therapist: Is that true? Me: Check your pocket. [he pulls out a piece of paper with 'NO' written on it]"
"Ever hear about the box that was coming down with something? It was coffin"
"A guy calls the hospital. He says, ""You gotta send help! My wife's going into labor!"" The nurse says, ""Calm down. Is this her first child?"" He says, ""No! This is her husband!"""
"""I hate it when you go off on tangents!"" ""I hate it when YOU go off on cosines!"" Irreconcilable trigonometry can kill a relationship."
"There's nothing like sitting by an open fire..watching the evidence burn."
"How does a football player make phone calls? On a touch-down phone."
"What's the difference between Batman and a Black man? Batman can go out at night without Robin"
"Today, I made the little things count by teaching math to midgets....."