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Joke of the Day

"u could put a horse in a time machine and send it to any era and the horse's life would literally be the same"

"Did you hear about the fire at the flame retardant textile manufacturer? Someone left the irony on..."

"I hope the rain keeps up so it won't come down."

"Why can't you hear a pterodactyl peeing? Because the p is silent. Yes. My 9 year old cracked me up with that just now."

"Did you hear about the new strain of bird flu? Chirpees... a canarial disease... un-tweetable."

"I work in an elevator. It has its ups and downs."

"How do you starve a black man? Put his food stamps in his work boots."

"What do you do when your one night stand doesn't take Plan B? Plan C-ya."

"Two bookworms were having a dispute... ...across an open book until one bookworm moves closer to the other and says, ""well then, I'm glad we're on the same page."""

"Which bees produce milk? ...The boo-bees!"