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Joke of the Day

"What organ in the body never dies? THE LIVER. ometrist will copyright this joke. hopefully."

"PATIENT: I bet medical school was pretty tough DR DOG: yeah I remember one time I did my assignment 4 times bc I ate the first 3 copies lol"

"How did Jared lose 30 pounds? He dumped his girlfriend."

"Yoga? No thank you. I'll download an app to my phone so I don't have to stretch for the remote."

"I love it when a girl takes control. Birth control specifically."

"Why is it I barely have any signal in my house but the fucking Taliban can upload videos from a cave in Afghanistan??"

"[2 Years into Cosmetology School] Me:[applying perfect contours] When are we gonna start learning about space?"

"My impression of a New Zealand duck: Quick... Quick. Quick."

"What is Donald Trump's favourite music album? The Wall"

"Here's the one way to avoid clickbait (screw the other OP!). [Click here for the truth!](http://www.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/2tjg13/heres_the_one_way_to_avoid_clickbait_screw_the/)"