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Joke of the Day

"I'd love to go out with you, but my favorite commercial is on TV."

"To some, it's known as ""soda."" Some call it ""pop."" Some even order it as ""coke"" or ""cola."" The spicy bubble brown juice goes by many names"

"Friends are like boobs. You've got small ones, big ones, real ones, and fake ones."

"Cigarette's killed my wife. She was run over by the Marlboro truck."

"I can never tell if my cat left a dead bird at my door, or if it's the dead bird I ordered from Amazon."

"What is a big dinner for a cannibal? A three-corpse meal."

"I don't think my neighbor knows my rule about not interacting unless we're both pointing at the same tornado."

"I told my Chinese friend that I like homemade gifts.... So for Christmas he gave me an iPhone, iPad and an iMac."

"The guy who invented the velcro died last week RIP"

"What weapons did the Romans use to fight the Carthaginians As-salt rifles"