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Joke of the Day
"I bought a boomerang from a ghost yesterday.. I know it's going to come back to haunt me!"
Next Joke
"I was gonna make a joke about my dog being a freak on a leash... But it was too korny"
"I made up a color in my head today. It was a pigment of my imagination."
"I always wink at the local Funeral Director, because he will be the last one to see me naked, and I don't want it to be awkward."
"What do I need a girlfriend for? When the Reddit servers are ready to go down on me anytime?"
"Alcohol makes me worse at everything except telling secrets."
"Some acids walked into the enemy base... Threat Neutralized."
"Apparently ""cool story, bro"" is not an acceptable substitute for ""congratulations"" when your friend calls and tells you she's pregnant."
"Car broke down. Seen enough Man vs Wild to survive. 20mins later when the tow truck showed up I was drinking urine out of a poodle's skull."
"Q: What do you call a blonde sky diving team? A: A new version of the lawn dart's game."