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Joke of the Day

"Neil Armstrong said ""One small step for man..."". I would've just said ""OH, MY GOD, I'M ON THE MOON!!!!!!""."

"What's the difference between a chickpea and a garbanzo bean? I've never paid to have a garbanzo bean on me"

"Jimmy: What has 100 legs but can't walk? Johnny: 50 pairs of pants? Jimmy: No, A centipede. Jhonny: What? why? Jimmy: Because I squished it"

"What do you call a web developer who enjoys finding bugs in the system? A spider"

"anyone hear about this gravity discovery proving einsteins theory correct? I hear its really making a wave"

"Why did Heisenberg have a miserable sex life? Because when he found the correct position, he didn't have the momentum, and when he finally found the time, he didn't have the energy."

"What's the difference beetwen public official and private employee? Private employee starts work checking email. Public official starts works making a coffee."

"People always ask, would you rather be right or happy? I have always found I'm happiest when I'm right!"

"A Chinese man goes to the doctor because of failing eyesight. DR. ""Mr. wong it looks like you have a cataract."" Mr. Wong "" No no I drive Rincon."""

"How many Hippies does it take to screw in a light bulb? Hippies don't screw in light bulbs, they screw in dirty sleeping bags in the woods."