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Joke of the Day
"To catch chlamydia, you have to think like chlamydia."
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"What did the conductor do when half of the cello section called in sick a week before a major concert? He was forced to resort to excessive violins."
"How do you get your wife to listen to every word without interrupting? Talk in your sleep."
"I like the religions where they're like ""god left after he made earth."" that's exactly what I would do if i created this mess."
"Who can't tell the difference between short and long? This subreddit mods"
"Where do cows like to ride on trains? In the cow-boose."
"Can someone throw Kevin Bacon in the freezing Artic waters and give him hypothermia? I NEED this six degrees of Kevin Bacon joke."
"It takes a car 30 years to become vintage. It takes a phone 30 days."
"Jesus Saves ... and Esposito scores on the rebound!"
"Relationship Status: Married long enough to know when I hear her say ""I love you,"" she's talking to our dog."