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Joke of the Day

"Who does Luke Skywalker ask to charge his lightsaber? Char-Jar Binks"

"I complimented my chemistry professor, who's from Germany, ""Sir, you're so effervescent."" He replied, ""Did you effer see me when I effer vasn't?"""

"I got an adjustable stand/sit desk at work... So I don't have to take the customers' shit sitting down! And when I can't stand it anymore, I can still get my work done while sitting."

"A bank is a place that will lend you money if you can prove that you don't need it."

"Why does Mario hate Punchbug? Because he bruises like-a Peach!"

"I'm the guy who invented the sandal for people with only one leg. It was a flop. Credit to 'flaggon' from sikipedia"

"That's not a candy cane in my pocket. I'm just glad to see you!"

"Dont worry people, you can still wear your LiveStrong braclets. Just cross out the V."

"My friend asked ""What do blind people think about when they masturbate?"" I'd be willing to bet that it is something along the lines of ""Who the f*ck is watching me"""

"Sweatpants and a hoodie: Sexy and I know it, but too lazy to show it."