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Joke of the Day

"I'm sitting outside drinking myself into a stupor. I may feel like shit tomorrow but by God, so will the mosquitoes."

"This woman's ""I'm deleting my Facebook"" post has 52 comments and she's replied to all of them. Not a strong start."

"Did you hear the one...? Did you hear the one about the Concubine and the Muse...? Fucking Inspirational...!!!"

"What is a paranoid man's favorite food? Who wants to know?"

"The subject line starts ""Fwd: Re: Fwd: RE: RE: Re: "", so there's no way this isn't a complete waste of time."

"Alcohol is never the answer, unless the question is being at a party and feeling socially awkward."

"How do we know that the toothbrush was invented in Mississippi? Because anywhere else it would've been called the teethbrush"

"What do you call a nun in a wheelchair Virgin Mobile"

"What's the best way to get a Jewish girl's number? Roll up her sleeve."

"Why don't vegans eat chicken? Because it contains egg..."