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Joke of the Day

"Wife: Your PMS jokes aren't funny. Me: I can't help it, they just flow out of my mouth. Wife: ... Me: Fine. No more. Period. Wife: *eyeroll*"

"What do you get when you cross Donald Trump with Hillary Clinton? A dickless bull that can't fuck its way into the white house. But who tell which is which?"

"Robin: ""Please?"" Batman: ""No."" ""It's prom!"" ""You can't drive the Batmobile!"" Alfred: ""Can I? It's Bingo night."" Batman: *tosses keys*"

"You do realize that if you save yourself for marriage, you'll only have sex like three or four times ever?"

"What goes ""Clip clop, clip clop, clip clop, clip clop, BANG, clip clop, clip clop""? Amish drive by shooting."

"Did you hear about the man who was murdered in an elevator? It was wrong on so many levels."

"What does a greengrocer weigh? Vegetables."

"Equality That's the joke."

"Deep Thoughts Do you think that, when two police officers are having sex, they appreciate the fact that they are copulating?"

"Did you hear about the two antennas that got married? The wedding was lousy, but the reception was great!"