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Joke of the Day
"My wife and I made a vow to never go to bed angry. I'm so fucking tired!"
Next Joke
"What's the worst part about eating a vegetable? Taking her out of the wheelchair and putting her into bed."
"What's at the end of Moby Dick? A whale of a time!"
"What's the difference between Hillary Clinton and an AR 15? One is responsible for the deaths of Americans, the other is an inanimate object."
"How many women have you slept with wife asked husband, ""How many women have you slept with?"" he proudly replied, ""Only you, Darling. With all the others I was awake."""
"I always clench up before I drive into a tunnel because I'm afraid Wile E. Coyote might have just drawn it on there."
"Here's a joke for ya. A dyslexic man walks in to a bra."
"Keep your friends close and your enemies in the trunk of your car."
"A man brought a dead animal onto a plane... When the flight attendant asked what he was doing, he simply replied, ""It's my carrion luggage!"""
"If video games have taught me anything, it's that you'll automatically get promoted if you kill your boss"