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Joke of the Day

"My father works as a statistician at Ford. He must be pretty well-respected there, people are always asking for his auto graph."

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"i showed an african kid ""the human centipede film"".... he wasn't hungry anymore"
"This is a terrible week for Thanksgiving This time, Turkey is doing the roasting ijusthadtoimsosorry"
"Why does a rapper need an umbrella? Fo' drizzle."
"What do you call a German living in Canada? A leder hoser."
"A girl asked me if I had AIDS... I said: ""Uh, I don't think you can get that from a goat."""
"Knock knock. Who's there? Owls go. Owls go who?"
"""Let's call it a day."" -Guy who invented that word"
"To be honest, I really don't give a f*ck. I lose friends, make friends and make enemies everyday. Regardless, I'm still going to be me..."
"Nature fact: The female cat gives birth to the body and head of her kittens separately and has to screw the head in like a lightbulb."