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Joke of the Day

"MAD TOILET - that is HILARIOUS ! :D :D Extremely funny and positive Android Game :D :D https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=game.mibejo.madtoilet"

"Where does a mathematician go when he gets hurt? L'Hospital."

"[running from cop] *cop catches me* ""Get on the ground or I'll taze ya"" *pulls jellyfish from pocket* ""Look they were all out of tazers"""

"Sometimes you check the amount of subscribed people. When you do this, there are 4,111,093,0003.666 ""humorists"". 2/3rds of a person? Really?"

"Wanna race? Ok, I got white"

"Why wasn't the pirate invited to the movie theater? Because they didn't have movie theaters back in the 1800's."

"What do you call a wannabe model? A poser!"

"My girlfriend left me 6 weeks ago because she thinks I'm immature. Now I'm all alone on Christmas day and crying my eyes out because Santa didn't come."

"Stevie wonder may be a great musician, But he is a terrible dad.. He never sees his kids."

"What's the difference between a Toaster and Hitler? A toaster can only burn two things at once."