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Joke of the Day

"[running from cop] *cop catches me* ""Get on the ground or I'll taze ya"" *pulls jellyfish from pocket* ""Look they were all out of tazers"""

Next Joke
 
"What do you call a Mexican Ghost? A Juanting."
"ababbaaaabbabbbbabababababbbaaabababbabaaaba ....long time no C"
"A programmer gets upset when he hears women shouldn't be objectified... He demands, ""Are you suggesting women are primitives?"""
"WAITER:What would you like? ME:What would YOU like? W:Excuse me? M:No one ever asks you, do they? W:*tearing up* No.. they don't. Thank you."
"When summer comes and California starts burning, try to act surprised."
"Why crush your kid's imagination by telling them the Tooth Fairy ""doesn't exist"" when you can just have her leave a suicide note?"
"Why do waiters prefer elephants to flies? Have you ever heard anyone complaining of a elephant in their soup? ."
"I got fired from the calendar factory... I guess I shouldn't have taken so many days off."
"Did you know the earth is over 70 percent water? Now what if all that water voted"