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Joke of the Day

"I remember watching this excellent porno back in 2002 so I tried to find it on the internet. In hindsight, typing ""14 year old porn"" into Google probably wasn't my smartest idea"

"Where do rednecks eat in the city? Hick-fil-a"

"Dad, did you let the parrot name me? - Haha, no that's ridiculous, Brock."

"My wife is leaving me because of my obsession with Star Wars'. I said: ""May divorce be with you."""

"""But Lot's wife looked back as she was following behind him, and she turned into a pillar of salt, and Lot was like 'wtf' "" Genesis 19:26"

"I recently came out as pansexual. But I'm only attracted to cast iron. I've tried dating teflon, but it never sticks. I guess it's true what they say: ""Once you go black, you never go back"""

"Arnold Schwarzenegger's now working in pest control... He's an ex-terminator."

"As someone who didn't win a lot of awards, I enjoyed going to the dentist it was one of the few times I was recognized by plaque"

"Why did the hipster's mouth hurt? Because he ate pizza before it was cool."

"When I get murdered the neighbors will be on the news like, ""Wow, I can't believe it took so long."""