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Joke of the Day

"Jesus. Jesus seemed like he was probably a good guy; healed the sick, fed the hungry, and gave good advice. Jesus had only one flaw: he was always hanging around."

"Why are the mountains in Switzerland called ""the Alps""? Because when people fall off of 'em, they yell AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAALLLLLLPPPP!!!!!!!!"

"How did the scientist like his guacamole? With lots of Avogadro!"

"A man walks into an auto parts store and says ""I'd like a rear view mirror for my Yugo."" The man behind the counter thinks about this for a while then says ""Yup seems like a fair trade to me."""

"What do you call a lonely orator? A master debater."

"What do chickens say? Cock-a-doodle-doo What does a chicken in the bathroom say? Doodle-doodle-cock What does a gay chicken say? Any-cock'll-do"

"Why is air a lot like sex? Because it's no big deal unless you're not getting any"

"What do you call a short mexican? A paragraph, hes not a full essay yet."

"If towels could tell jokes... They would have a dry sense of humor."

"Why was the nerd not late for class? ...He booked it."