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Joke of the Day
"Why is air a lot like sex? Because it's no big deal unless you're not getting any"
Next Joke
"Bet you didn't notice the the word the' has been said twice. "
"Just blew pot smoke on the huge spider hiding in my shower. I figure if I do this a few more times, he'll be too stoned to attack me."
"My girlfriend is amazing, she is a Chinese food chef So shes very Lo Mein-tenance"
"I'm forbidding the twelve people who regularly star my tweets to ever fly in an airplane together."
"College parties are great: You're taking shots with future doctors and the next Supreme Court judge is throwing up in the bathroom."
"Irony Is getting pregnant on a pull out couch"
"Jesus was such a player.... ...he was laid in a manger"
"Why did the Muslim cross the road? I said to my self as I floored the accelerator. Although I guess he did get to the other side."
"I ""Liked"" your comment on my status update because I'm too lazy to respond."