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Joke of the Day

"Sometimes I try to eat healthy but my stomach's like ""what if you die tomorrow?"" and I'm like ""good point"" and I have a whole pizza."

"What do Donald Trump and the Chinese have in common? Im not going to make a shit joke about a wall get out of here"

"How far can you walk into the forest? Halfway, when you walk further then you will walk out of the forest! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAH"

"What do lawyers wear to court? Lawsuits! Courtesy of the popsicle I just enjoyed. Had to share. Have a great day."

"Why engineers are boring"

"When drinking liquor while watching baseball, at what point will you be the most drunk? Bottom of the fifth, of course."

"What is small furry and smells like bacon ? A hamster !"

"What do you call a skank playing ""H.O.R.S.E?"" She missed two shots, so she's a ho. I'll leave now."

"What did it say on the former chairman of the Hypochondriac Association's tombstone? Told you!"

"""Wanna hear a chemistry joke?"" ""Na, man, I'm good."" ""Wow, you didn't have to get salty over it."" (Chemically inaccurate but who cares, right?)"