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Joke of the Day

"Wives live longer than their husbands.. because they are not married to a woman (Courtesy ""Whose Line It is Anyway"")"

"Why can't there be some sort of mathematic formula for making friends? A squadratic formula, if you will."

"You'd think that with NSA reading our tweets all the time, they could star or retweet some of the good ones."

"Fred: Did you hear about the Irish window cleaner who put a sign at the top of his ladder? Harry: What did the sign say? Fred: Stop."

"Let's vote the pool water off that celebrity diving show."

"I once ate an entire pack of rope I shit you knot."

"I just can't stop making dad jokes! I don't know how much father I can go...."

"Did you know that Helen Keller had a dollhouse? She didn't."

"A piece of toast and a hard boiled egg walked into a bar..... The bartender says "" Sorry, we don't serve breakfast here""."

"what do men with erectile disfunction and nintendo cartridges have in common? It works if you blow it before you put it in."