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Joke of the Day

"Fred: Did you hear about the Irish window cleaner who put a sign at the top of his ladder? Harry: What did the sign say? Fred: Stop."

"Why do Asians have squinty eyes? because their future is so bright"

"What do you call a dating service for lumberjacks? Timbr"

"It seems kid of arbitrary that people want their skin to be tan and their teeth to be white. In Opposite Land, I must be a fuckin' hottie."

"Knock Knock Who's there ! Chair ! Chair who? Chair you go again asking more questions !"

"A termite walks into a bar and asks ""is the bartender here?"" Is the bar tender here?"

"I expected a medal for my bravery when I had a full-leg cast on. Instead, I got atrophy."

"What Happens when the Cubs win the World Series? ...They Leave a Trail of Tears"

"My dad asked why i have a gun in my house Is said because of the decepticons, i laughed, my dad laughed, the toaster laughed, i shot the toaster, it was a good night."

"Taking calculus has made me want to become Prime Minister of a European country Then I can just throw money at problems instead of trying to integrate them."