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Joke of the Day

"A piece of toast and a hard boiled egg walked into a bar..... The bartender says "" Sorry, we don't serve breakfast here""."

"What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot you racist."

"An unconscious man arrives at a hospital... After a series of x-rays, the radiologist discovered the man had several plastic horses in his anus. The doctors have declared his condition as ""stable."""

"What do you call a dictionary that smokes weed? High definition"

"How much is twelve units of mass? Dozen matter."

"This girl wanted to marry a ghost. I can't think what possessed her."

"Everybody at this intervention is telling me I have a drug problem but I'm not the one with a melting eagle face & gyrating serpent arms."

"Down in de islands, what do they call de dew in de morning? Daylight come!"

"""My Ex is amazing in all ways. My Ex is smarter, more successful, and more attractive than I am."" - bumper sticker I put on my Ex's car"

"Two fish are STILL in a tank one turns to the other and says ""NOPE!"""