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Joke of the Day

"No thanks Kentucky Derby. If I wanted to see a defenseless animal get beat into submission I'd just call my boss."

"I've been reading a book on euthanasia... It's so good I can't put it down."

"What do you call a black priest? Holy shit!"

"Pick a number, now add 7, divide by 4, write it down. Now get an apple, name it, show it a picture of your cat. Now go to bed,you're drunk."

"What did one autumn leaf say to another? I'm falling for you."

"What`s the definition of frustration? A 16 year old boy outside the Fuck-For-A-Buck shop with only 99 cents."

"popcorn, or as cerebral smart minds such as myself refer to it 'popped corn', is the number #1 food of watching things"

"""I can't begin to tell y-"" ""Good."""

"Chief Running Water had two sons. What were their names? Hot and Cold."

"We will require you to do something somewhat onerous and time-comsuming and then introduce impediments to completing it. - my employer"