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Joke of the Day
"What's green and eats nuts? Syphilis"
Next Joke
"[at TED talk] OMG that man is having a heart attack! Anyone here a doctor? *entire crowd stands* No a MEDICAL doctor *entire crowd sits*"
"What did u do last night? Me: I drowned my swallows in whiskey Don't u mean sorrows? Me [covering tub of dead birds]: is that the saying?"
"I like my women like I like my coffee... Hot and not talking."
"what car do people drive in Norway when it floods? the fjord escape"
"The week has seven days: Monday, Monday, Monday, Monday, Friday, Saturday and preMonday."
"So apparently in a job interview, if the interviewer asks you to choose one word that describes you, the correct answer is not fergalicious."
"What does Mario wear? Denim denim denim"
"Blizzards are like sex it's really fun while it's happening but afterwards there's a lot of white stuff laying around that no one knows what to do with"
"What did one math book say to the other? Don't bother me; I've got my own *problems!*"