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Joke of the Day

"What is a crossbreed between an elephant and a rhinoceros called? I don't know, but it isn't *relevant*!"

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"What do you call the ghost of a chicken? A poultry-geist."
"If your a kid and want to become cooler, heres a tip. Start smoking cigarette's. You can thank me later."
"what's the difference between a my girlfriend and a voice activated sink? One gets turned on and all wet when I speak to it. The other is a voice activated sink."
"What is everyone using to scrape ice off their windscreen? This morning I used a discount card from my wallet, but it was no good. I only got 20% off.....!!"
"How are tornadoes and women alike? They both moan like hell when they come, and they take the whole damn house when they leave."
"""I'd like to make a large cash deposit"" teller: ok, how much do you have? ""Wow can't a guy just share his dreams without being pressured?"""
"I'm dyslexic and diabetic... So needless to say, I'm laying off the crabs."
"Door-to-door Christian guy: Have you heard the greatest story ever told? Me: Definitely. I love Star Wars."
"Im offended by physicists being all about black matter I think All Matter"
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