120410
Joke of the Day
"mom: do the dishes me: i cant im ugly"
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"How do you keep the Kansas City Chiefs away from your house? Paint a goal line on your driveway."
"Barrack Obama In India :p 15,000 CCTVs getting installed for Obama's visit in Delh.i (India). That's just racist. Just because he's black doesn't mean he'll steal anything."
"What do you call a frozen Communist? A hammer and pop-sickle"
"My father always told me it isn't real money if you don't make it yourself..... of course that was before he got arrested for counterfeiting."
"Lock an astronomer in a basement... and they'll go star craving mad."
"It's 2012, aka the future. Don't ask me to print shit out, sign, scan, fax, etc. You're not the CIA. Dial it down, Patty Printsalot."
"Police Officer: Why are you driving in a bathing suit? Motorist: I'm in a car pool."
"I wear Lacoste shirts with the little crocodile on them because when shit goes down I want crocodiles to know that I'm on their side."
"Why is it that whenever you complement someone on their mustache... suddenly she's not your friend anymore?"