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Joke of the Day

"DON'T shoot for the moon if you miss, you will land among the stars alone and asphyxiating"

"As I get older, I'm really just looking for Girls Gone Mild."

"Welcome to the BBC... Welcome to the BBC. Rape all the children you like, just don't punch a producer."

"Gay people make me sick I should really stop deepthroating them so hard..."

"What's the difference between Jesus and a picture of Jesus? The picture only needs one nail to hold up."

"My neighbours probably think I'm getting laid, but these are just the sounds I make whenever I take my socks off."

"A Jewish man had a son, who converted to Christianity. The man prayed to God, ""Oh Lord, my son has converted to Christianity! What should I do?"" And God replied, ""Yours too?"""

"What time does Sean Connery like to go to Wimbledon at? Tenish."

"Hey, I have a good joke about pussy Oh wait... you might not get it..."

"What do you call a quadruple amputee trying to swim? Bob. Same guy laying on the floor? Matt. Same guy hanging on the wall? Art. Same guy in a mailbox? Bill."