119807

Joke of the Day

"She is such a hoe that she doesn't have boyfriends.. ...she has daily active users."

"Did you hear about the guy who cooled himself to absolute zero? He's OK now"

"I watched ""The Edge of Tomorrow"" hundreds of times there seems to be an awful lot of alternative endings though."

"What did the letter "" O "" say to the letter "" Q "" ? Dudddeee.....your dicks out!"

"I should run for public office just to see the scandalous dirt they dig up on me. I would really like to piece together my twenties."

"Who does a lobster have in common with a broken hearted chinaman? They are both crustaceans."

"If I'm ever reincarnated I hope I get to be a bear because I'll be like ""stop playing dead, I used to be human. That shits not gonna work!"""

"I wish I could explain to my cat that when I sneeze it doesn't mean the world is ending."

"Why was the peanut so salty? Because it got R O A S T E D"

"I don't understand the purpose of smooth objects. I mean, there's no point."