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Joke of the Day

"Did you hear about the electrician who bought a Camaro using money he got from scrap wire? He really crimped and saved"

"Did you hear Uber and Lyft are merging? They're rebranding as ""Luber: For when you need to come fast!"""

"[nsfw] What do you call an anorexic girl with a yeast infection? A quarter-pounder with cheese."

"I accidentally arrived at work five minutes early today. Speeding CAN be dangerous, kids."

"Where does Joseph Kony train his soldiers? Arizona"

"I told my girlfriend that I wanted to be cremated.. I then told my family that I had no specific burial requests, just make sure that they don't have me cremated, no matter what."

"How many /r/twoxchromosomes posters does it take to change a lightbulb? Ten. 1 to screw in the lightbulb, and the other 9 to provide emotional support."

"Donald Trump always looks like he's trying to apply lip gloss in a rear view mirror."

"I am a joke. I am not a joke. What is laughter? DEATH! I died of laughter tomorrow!"

"Why did the feminist fail algebra? She couldn't solve inequalities."