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Joke of the Day

"Did you hear Uber and Lyft are merging? They're rebranding as ""Luber: For when you need to come fast!"""

"A few disenfranchised primates got together to start a revolution.. ..they called it 'Gorilla Radio'.."

"My boyfriend says I'm kind of selfish, but that's not true. I often think of other people. When I'm having sex with him."

"Before I lose my phone, end up naked, high, drunk and/or possibly arrested, I would like to wish you all a Happy Friday."

"I too like my women like I like my laptop. Laying there dying, while I masturbate to it."

"What's wrong with the plane that flies to Holland? It Netherlands."

"A Priest walks in to a hotel to check in... And he asks the clerk at the front desk, ""Is the pornography disabled in my room?"" The clerk responds, ""No, it's regular porn you sick fuck!"""

"Yelling at a dog to stop barking doesn't work. The dog probably just thinks, Awesome, now we're both barking"

"How many perverts does it take to put in a light bulb? Only one, but... It takes the entire ER department to get it back out."

"My new bondage equipment really ties the room together."