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Joke of the Day

"How do you make a hormone? Don't pay her..."

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"What does the ghost like on his roast beef? grave-y gravy"
"How to tell if you're wearing too much Axe: 1. Are you wearing Axe? No- Good. Yes- That's too much."
"Her: I have Netflix if you wanna come watch a movie :) Me: No it's ok, I have my own account [60 years later on deathbed] Me: Wait a minute"
"Coworker: What a crazy weekend! Me: *takes a knee* CW: What are you doing? M: Protesting this conversation."
"HOW I DRESS FOR UNIVERSITY First day of the week: brad pitt Last day of the week: homeless druggie"
"Did you hear about the two guys that stole a calendar? They each got six months"
"My girlfriend treats me like a god. She ignores me until she needs something."
"What does Reddit and Dating have in common? It wastes your time and you walk away with either tears or a slight chuckle."
"Who is busier than a one-toothed man in a corn eating contest? A one-legged man in an ass kicking contest."