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Joke of the Day

"My girlfriend put on a few pounds recently. That explains why I'm attracted to her more."

"Always remember you're someones reason to smile Because you are a joke"

"I don't know why you are complaining about your appearance, your personality is even worse."

"Boss: OMFG man what happened to ur eye? [cut to me riding a horse into the garage door during medieval role play] ""I ran into a door"""

"Outside of a dog, a book is a man's best friend. Inside of a dog, though, it's every man for himself"

"After being hit by an airstrike from the Turkish air force, a Syrian leader was quoted as saying... ""As God is my witness, I thought the Turkish couldn't fly..."""

"If you have Bee in your hand, what do you have in your eye? Beauty. Because beauty is in the eye of the Bee holder."

"What do you call a Mexican knight? The Chosen Juan."

"This one is for the Electricians A black guy, a red guy and a blue guy all walk into a bar. The bartender says ""we don't serve your kind around here, this here is the neutral bar""."

"If this song were a fish, it'd be a Tuuunna Fish Back me up here guys...I don't think this is a funny joke, but the person who said it is so sure it's hilarious"