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Joke of the Day

"Sorry hun, but unlike you, I'm not a doorknob where everyone gets a turn. I'm more of a casino where only the lucky ones hit the jackpot."

"His son asked him what gay meant. Son: Dad, what does gay mean? Dad: Happy son. It means happy. Son: Then are YOU gay DAD? Dad: No son...... i have a wife... EDIT: Damn this blew up. Thanks guys!"

"I like my women like I like my third games in a series by Valve... I think they're gonna be great, but they never seem to come."

"What's grey and comes in pints? An Elephant."

"So Fabio is endorsing a new line of Fleshlights They're calling them ""I can't believe it's not butt."""

"What was the stressed out toddler diagnosed with? Diapertension"

"My sister asked if I stole her cream sweater. Uh, yeah. Who else would've stolen it? You think a burglar broke in and was like ""Cute top!"""

"What is the hardest part about eating a vegetable? The wheelchair."

"I inherited an Epipen My friend gave it to me as he was dying. It seemed very important to him that I have it."

"Outsize Clothes-buying by Ellie Fant"