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Joke of the Day
"Mom, you bought me the wrong magazine! This isn't MAD, this is DISAPPOINTED!"
Next Joke
"What is the fastest insect in the World? ""Lice"" Why? ... Because it is latching on a running Cheetah."
"Q: What is it that all men have one of; it's longer on some men than on others; the Pope doesn't use his; and a man gives it to his wife after they're married? A: surname"
"Chuck Norris got a perfect score on his SAT's, simply by writing Chuck Norris for every answer."
"*intercom comes on* ""Would the owner of a white Jetta with headlight eyelashes please report to the front desk so u can be shot in the face"""
"Stop making mini snacks, people. Never have I been like, ""wow this is a delicious cupcake. If only it were 1/4 of the size."""
"There's a man with two penises? That's nothing, I once knew a guy with FIVE penises... ...and his pants fit like a glove."
"A mathematician walks into a pizza shop... They request one pie. Upon getting a full pizza, they exclaim, ""You gave me twice as many radians as I asked for!"""
"I'm hungry but broke so I'm waiting for my bf to say he's hungry too than he'll order something delicious while I pretend to be indifferent."
"Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have schizophrenia. And so do I..."