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Joke of the Day
"Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have schizophrenia. And so do I..."
Next Joke
"What'sApp Me: Mom, what's for dinner? Mom : typing ... *gets married* *have kids* *gets old* *dies* *goes to hell* Mom: Fish, honey!"
"Putting a woman on a $10 makes sense . . . . . . no one really wants a 1 or a 5. (As heard on Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me)"
"I'm a magician of sorts. I steal candy bars using sleight of hand. You could say I have a few Twix up my sleeve."
"[texting] Wife: Clean out your bowels. Me: OK. Wife: *bowls. The ones in the sink Me: *chugging laxatives* Damn it."
"I knew a girl so ugly, she fell asleep at a frat party... and she woke up with more clothes on. (Stolen from Big Bang theory, I just love this joke)"
"May: What position does your brother play in the school football team ? Jay: I think he's one of the drawbacks !"
"What's a star trek fans favourite drink? Picardi and Kirk"
"What is that the more you desire, the less you can get? Beautiful girls."
"My arc would have been filled with wolves. I would have made a terrible Noah."