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Joke of the Day

"How do you make a Game of Thrones fan sad? You ask them to hold the door for you."

"I was suffering from pinkeye for a long time until I found www.curing-conjunctivitis.com It was a site for sore eyes"

"I caught my wife having sex with another man with the lights on I didn't know had married a man!"

"How does every racist joke start? *glances to the left, glances to the right."

"Best book quotes out of context Touching the void: 'Fuck me, it's enormous!'"

"I hear most Muslims are capitalists... They're always going on and on about some Great Profit."

"When I was your age, I was outside all day until dark 15: The batteries on cell phones must have been a lot better back then Me: ........."

"WebMD has a mobile app now. An app!!! A quick, easy and convenient way to diagnose yourself with cancer anywhere!"

"How do pirates agree with each other over long distances? With their aye-phones."

"I'm that friend that you have to explain to people before you introduce me and apologize about afterwards."