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Joke of the Day

"I feel like Frosted Flakes gives kids an unreasonable expectation of how friendly tigers are when you try to feed them a bowl of cereal."

"Did you read the book ""The History of Glue""? I couldn't put it down!"

"What do you call a nun in a wheelchair? Virgin mobile (Im going to fucking hell. I shouldnt have laughed at this so hard.)"

"in kindergarden i pooped my pants and got insanely mad when another kid asked me about it, and that's also the president's PR strategy"

"Kim Davis says war has been declared on traditional marriage. Still unclear is which of her four marriages is under attack."

"What's the difference between a barrel rider, and a can of Copenhagen? You can only fit 3 fingers in a can of Copenhagen."

"A prostitute said she would do anything for 10 dollars. Look who just got his car washed. THIS GUY!"

"Today is National 'Secure a rich lover' Day Mate wealth, 2016."

"What do you call pasta with alzheimers? forgetti"

"How many controlled oposition does it take to change a light bulb? None you know of. Since they signed a Non Disclosure Agreement to not talk about it."