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Joke of the Day

"The lady next door ran over my cat. She said she'd replace it, so I asked her how good she was at catching mice. Courtesy of Mary Poppins."

Next Joke
 
"I judge the strength of the economy based on what type of candy people hand out on Halloween."
"the butter churner asked the milk ""whats wrong..."" the milk responded ""im just a bit stirred up but ill be butter in a while"""
"What do the Syrian refugees and water have in common? They both keep trying to get on our shores...."
"Have you guys heard the story about the butter? You know what, never mind. I don't want to spread it around."
"How many Scene kids does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Some obscure number, you've probably never heard of it"
"My sense of humor has been described as ""please stop"" and ""you're ruining dinner"""
"What's Beethoven's favorite fruit? A ba-na-na-naaaaa"
"Q: What did the can say to the can opener? A: You make me flip my lid."
"People who are offended when I breastfeed in public need to shut the fuck up What I'm doing is **natural** and strengthens the bond between me and my dog."