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Joke of the Day
"There are two types of people in this world, Those who can extrapolate from incomplete data."
Next Joke
"Sometimes you need a little distance to see things clearly, but other times it is obviously a bear and you should probably just run"
"Want to know why I look terrible? Well, half of it is my mother's fault."
"Larry is a biologist who prefers to observe his deep-sea specimens up close in the field He works well under pressure"
"Do you know how to get a witch pregnant..... You fuck her"
"Why did the librarian slip and fall on the library floor? Because she was in the non-friction section."
"What is the difference between Game of Thrones and Twitter? With Twitter the number of characters do not go down with time"
"[lookin in bushes for our baby] me: where the hell can he be? dog: roof roof roof me: will you shut up [baby waves at the dog from the roof]"
"Closing all the internet windows by the time your boss gets to your desk is like getting the keys into the door before the killer gets you."
"An atheist, a Muslim, and a Born-again Christian are seated together on a plane. They have a pleasant flight because they're not assholes."