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Joke of the Day

"Why did the librarian slip and fall on the library floor? Because she was in the non-friction section."

"Meanwhile, in mid-2015 A Google Glass wearer and an Apple Watch wearer are arguing in a bar over who looks like a huger idiot."

"The Ancient Mayans have predicted the world will end on December 21, 2012. They also worshipped a Corn God named Ah Mun."

"I haven't been doing so well at the poop assembly line... My manager said if I don't pull my shit together soon I'll be fired."

"Shut up & eat. There are people starving in Abercrombie & Fitch."

"A blonde, a brunette and a redhead are sitting in the first grade, who has the biggest boobs? The blonde, because she's 18."

"Best Husband A couple is lying in bed. The man says, ""I am going to make you the happiest woman in the world."" The woman replies, ""I'll miss you..."""

"Doctor! Doctor! I think I have Barry Manilow's disease! ""What are your symptoms?"" ""I can't laugh and I can't sing. I'm finding it hard to do anything!"""

"What car does Hitler drive? [OC] A fuhrerri."

"Who was the heaviest of the Pharaohs? King Two-ton-khamen."