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Joke of the Day

"Just heard a 15 year old call an autobiography a word selfie *points finger gun at mouth* *pulls trigger*"

"Why did the console player get sick in the art gallery? There were too many frames."

"Q: Why couldn't the pirate play cards? A: Because he was sitting on the deck !"

"I need some white people jokes! I would especially love to hear these from someone of a different race. It's my birthday and this would make it complete."

"The link between Eschatology and Scatology While no one really knows what will happen at the end of times, one thing is certain. It will all go to shit."

"The real reason Darth Vader cut off Luke's hand was because he touched the thermostat"

"Doctor Doctor I think I'm a bridge What's come over you? Oh two cars a large truck and a coach."

"Came downstairs to find my 85 year old mum watching the TV Me:"" Why are you watching Thatcher's funeral?"" Mum: ""Just to make sure"""

"I feel bad for Kim-Jong Un It's hard being the fat kid in high school, so it must be really difficult being the only fat kid in the country."

"My Birthday For my birthday I asked for a bicycle, an action man, and a vibrating butt plug... I never got that bike."