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Joke of the Day

"[sifting through mail] baby shower invitation? Haha, um no thanks, Linda. I have a regular size shower that I can use whenever I want"

"What do Aussies call mates? Cunts. ""Sup cunt""."

"How do you know when your BBQ is ready in Canada in April? The snow on top of it has melted."

"What does batman take in his whiskey? Just ice."

"Funniest Joke Ever. Nevermind, it actually isn't that funny. Ok well... A bear and a rabbit... No no... It's not that funny. Nevermind."

"What is the difference between a baby and a bag of cocaine? Eric Clapton would NEVER drop a bag of cocaine."

"How much do you want to bet that the inventor of the Lazy Susan has an ex-wife named Susan?"

"A real woman can raise a child by herself, but a real man would never LET her"

"If you are skydiving and your parachute doesn't open, don't worry You've got the rest of your life to fix it."

"How many performance artists does it take to change a lightbulb? I don't know, I left early."