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Joke of the Day

"We won't know we've truly made it as a society until computers in movies stop making beeping noises"

"My 9 year old son - ""If I ever get Bieber fever, just let the fever kill me."""

"""how was self-deprecating rap battle?"" I don't want to talk about it ""come on what happened?"" they saw my porsche ""oh ouch"""

"If I had a dollar for every time a woman find me attractive... I'd have a dollar, thanks mom"

"My wife says I have a short attention spanish is a beautiful language isn't it?"

"What's Moby Dick's Dad's name? Papa Boner"

"Everyone at this party is talking like a pilot.. ...they all keep saying they have to take off in the morning."

"I like my Presidents like I like my porn saved"

"Don't let the notion of being bad at something keep you from enjoying it Ask my wife."

"A psychic dwarf just escaped from prison... Apparently there's now a small medium at large"