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Joke of the Day

"Everyone at this party is talking like a pilot.. ...they all keep saying they have to take off in the morning."

"See a penny pick it up... All day long you'll have.... A nagging feeling that the previous owner wasn't a ""hand washer""."

"How do you tell a rabbit from a gorilla? A rabbit doesn't look like a gorilla."

"I was gonna open a clothing store for midgets... ... but the market was too small."

"Oh the Irony.... My predictive text doesn't know how to spell Nostradamus."

"What did the skeleton order at the restaurant? Spare ribs."

"In the future, bars will have airtight tubes people can go fart in. The tubes will have pipes that connect to prisons."

"Q: What do you call a drunken Muslim? A: Mohammered."

"What's the difference between water and gasoline? In Flint Michigan you can get gasoline that is unleaded."

"What's the difference between Sesame Street and Leonardo DiCaprio? Sesame Street has an Oscar."