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Joke of the Day

"Do you know the major difference between Hitler and Michael Phelps? Michael Phelps can actually finish a race."

"you must be irish because my penis is dublin"

"Most meth cooks start by clicking on an ad to make $500-$800 a day working from home."

"Hipsters burn their lips when they drink coffee Because they drink it before it's cool."

"What do you call a lesbian dinosaur? Alickalotopuss"

"Why did the chicken cross the road? As a child, you could have been anything. And one by one, you didn't become any of them."

"What did the cannibal do after dumping his girlfriend? He wiped his ass."

"What do you get when you cross a bunny with an orange? A pip squeak."

"Grocery produce aisle ME: Hi, are these genetically modified carrots? CLERK: No, why do you ask? CARROT: Yeah, why do you ask?"

"General Lee didn't have kids? A parent Lee not."