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Joke of the Day

"Doctor: Open your mouth (inserts tongue depressor) Me: Mmm, this tastes good. Dr: You should have tasted it when the Popcicle was on it!"

"I turned in my letter of resignation to my smug supervisor at the refrigeration plant. He accepted it with his usual air of condensation."

"I was about to make a joke about Jupiter and a spacecraft... ... but how did Juno about it?"

"How does a chicken do their hair? With a comb, In one fowl swoop."

"What do you call a fish with two knees? A two-knee fish! (works better when you're drunk)"

"When you're craving a Krabby Patty so bad!!! But the Krusty Krab is closed....and also fictional."

"A man asks his wife on a Friday evening... Husband: Shall we have a nice weekend? Wife: Sure, why not? Husband: Ok then, see you on Monday!"

"My gf told me to stop being childish, she just wants to come in for a talk not my fault she cant remember the password to my pillow fortress"

"Eminem had his own version of Bing Bong. But then he Forgot About Dre"

"r/jokes would be a great fencer After all, it seems to be extremely good with reposts ((Works best spoken))"