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Joke of the Day

"Two cannibals are eating a clown. One turns to the other and says... ""Does this guy taste funny to you?"""

"What's black, white, and too fast to see? The perfect mugging."

"I'm not letting anyone into my head until I've cleaned up the place."

"In order to understand your enemy, you must walk a mile in his shoes. If he's still your enemy after that, at least he's a mile away and hasn't got any shoes."

"I love that all the Catholics are easy to single out today. Can't believe no one's tried publically marking people by religion before."

"I just read a book about Stockholm Syndrome. It was pretty bad at first, but by the end I kinda liked it."

"She called and said she didn't have anywhere else to go, so I agreed with her."

"There are 10 types of people in the world. Those who understand binary, and those who don't."

"My neighbours just submitted a petition that I stop setting traps for stray pigs after I caught my 16th police man today."

"I just auditioned for a home makeover show because I'm too lazy to vacuum."