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Joke of the Day
"""And... uh... chocolate kills dogs."" - God puts the finishing touches on life on earth."
Next Joke
"A touchy-CNN reporter, while interviewing a Marine sniper asked, ""What do you feel when you shoot a terrorist?"" The Marine shrugged and replied, ""Recoil."""
"What do you call a woman who does not have all her toes on one foot? Normal"
"What has four legs and goes ""Oom! Oom!""? A cow walking backwards!"
"Did you hear about the baker who robbed a bank? He came in with buns glazing."
"What did the LOTR fan say to the LOTR hater? What are you Tolkien about..."
"Leave everyone stranded at a bank robbery to play laser tag when you're the get away driver and suddenly no one is your friend anymore"
"On the 1st episode of Casper the Friendly Ghost, Casper the Friendly Boy was eaten by a clown behind his grandparents' barn."
"These coffee flavored rice cakes are delicious, but chewy. [eats another coaster]"
"I'm such a heavy sleeper that i still wouldn't wake up even if you... shot me in the face"