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Joke of the Day

"[interview] ""How would you describe your people skills?"" ME: I tend to drive others away. ""That's great! Welcome to Uber."""

"Knock Knock Who's there ! Cork ! Cork who ? Cork and beans !"

"I'm sorry previews, but ""best movie of the year"" means nothing to me on January 18th."

"How to determine what party to vote for: 1) Calculate income 2) Divide by number of dependents 3) Subtract age 4) Download Game of War"

"The rising new trend is "" An@l Bleaching "". Usually I would be against such an activity ,but....Some ***holes do need to LIGHTEN UP !!"

"Nobody expects you to tweet brilliance. Just be yourself, with the occasional intent of bringing shame to your entire family."

"Why are track suits so popular song members of the former Soviet Union? Aww cheap. I screwed up the title."

"Why Do Ranchers Love Getting A Sore Throat? Because they always get a little hoarse"

"You didn't like it. I was going to tell you a joke about my time machine"

"How does a booze thief make you feel better? He lifts your spirits."