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Joke of the Day

"Why are track suits so popular song members of the former Soviet Union? Aww cheap. I screwed up the title."

"Your Momma is so classless... She could be a Marxist utopia"

"Touch it gently, put two fingers inside, if it's wide use three fingers, make sure it's wet and rub up and down. Yep that's how you wash a cup."

"Why can't you use a Palestinian toilet? It's occupied."

"Some elements walk into a bar... Oxygen, hydrogen, sulfer, sodium, and phosphorus all walk into a bar. The bartender says, ""OH SNaP!"""

"What did the Mexican firefighter name his two sons? Jose and Josb"

"A man went in to the bank and asked to see the man who arranged the loans. 'I'm sorry sir' said a cashier 'the loan arranger is out to lunch.' 'Can I speak to Tonto then?' asked the man."

"What is hot and makes me hard? Being covered in lava."

"Friends are like balloons; if you stab them, they die."

"Why are recycle bins optimistic? Because they're full of cans. *ba dum tss*"