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Joke of the Day

"The problem with driving a Yugo... ... is that the Czech engine light is always on."

"What's the difference between a kidney bean and a chickpea? I've never had a kidney bean on my face."

"I held a door for an elderly Japanese man. He said ""Sank you."" Why did he have to bring up Pearl Harbor like that?"

"Did you hear about the man who invented the knock-knock joke? He won the Nobel prize."

"How did Jesus feel after the Romans killed him? He felt pretty cross."

"Why isnt Monica Lewinsky voting for Hillary? The last Clinton left a bad taste in her mouth."

"To trick people into thinking I understand things at a museum I stand in front of every painting and silently count to twenty."

"My girl broke up with me, thinks I am childish. So, I calmed down. Took a deep breath. Went to her house. Rang the doorbell and ran away..HA!"

"i go to a lot of married ladies' funerals and play the part of an upset lover just to mix things up and for free shrimp"

"My father told me that I should condition more and shampoo less I told him to stop getting in the shower with me"